Lap dancing with Sugababes? Nah, don't think I'll bother

AT first I reckoned I must have heard Keisha Buchanan wrong. The Sugababe must have said something else, for surely no self-respecting pop goddess is short of a little company.

I'd asked the pretty singer how the UK tour was going – the same tour that brings the threesome to the Playhouse next week, hence Keisha's call – when she started bemoaning the fact the girls haven't been out clubbing much lately.

"It's been a nightmare," cried one third of the most successful all-female UK pop act of the Noughties. "We've not been out once – not once. The dancers and backing singers, they're out partying every night. But they never invite us.

"It's not how it should be," she continued with a sigh. "They're the ones with the hangovers, while we're all fresh-faced, having been couped up in our hotel rooms all night." Sack them, I told her. Keisha pondered this, and then made me an offer I couldn't refuse.

"Will you take us clubbing in Edinburgh?" she asked. "No, seriously?"

There was no point playing hard to get – so I didn't. After all, you wait ages for a pop star and then three come along at once. Three Sugababes, no less.

Keisha, Heidi Range and Amelle Berrabah – it was a result, no doubt about it.

"Sure, I'll take you out," I coolly answered, taking down her mobile number, while picturing myself on the cover of Heat magazine.

So, am I happy? Well, since you ask, no. The phone died on me this week and I hadn't stored Keisha's number to the sim. Bummer. Especially when it was reported that the girls nipped into a lap dancing bar last week, then kicked off their shoes for a go on the poles.

If the girls really are big exotic dancing fans, well, I wouldn't have gone wanting for a suitable venue. A friend of mine, who shall remain nameless, is a well-kent face at some of the West Port's finest establishments – so I'm sure he'd have known just where to take them.

Not to worry, Ross, maybe next time.

On the subject of babes, I was tucked up in bed with a Lemsip on Monday when a friend called to say he'd spotted Kate Moss having a half in his local.

The supermodel, who'd flown into the Capital to watch boyfriend Jamie Hince perform at the Liquid Room with his band The Kills, turned up at the Bow Bar on Victoria Street, and that's where my mate was drinking when he spotted the catwalk queen.

As expected, the papers were full of stories about Moss' visit – from where she had lunch, to what she was wearing.

Little wonder it grates on Hince's bandmate, Alison Mosshart, that having the A-lister in tow takes the focus off the band.

There was hardly a mention of the gig itself anywhere, which is pity, as The Kills are a great band.