Marc Bannerman - What I know about women

• Actor Marc Bannerman, 35, played Gianni di Marco in EastEnders for three years. He is currently single.

YOU could write what I know about women on a matchbox. We're a different species, we think in different ways.

(Crime writer] Martina Cole is the No 1 woman in my life. She is a very old friend; I'm godfather to her daughter. We met about 11 years ago at a friend's birthday party. Martina and I spent the whole evening talking – well, arguing mainly – about Irish history and politics. We're both Irish and Catholic. We hit it off straight away.

I spend at least every second weekend at her house. She looks after me – if I'm upset she'll take me in, fix me. She's amazing.

I didn't really have any female friends when I was younger. I got my first girlfriend much later than everyone else – I was 17. I used to box as a boy, so my whole life revolved around boxing and being a bit of a clown, neither of which were impressive to girls.

As I've got older, I've realised the value of friendships and the fact that you can't dedicate yourself to one woman. It's good to get a different perspective, see the world through women's eyes. Women are so much more sensitive and calm, rational and organised emotionally. I find it invaluable.

Martina is the greatest woman I've ever met. She's so well-read, driven and successful, a wonderful mother and human being. She's a little miracle in my eyes, I don't know what I'd do without her. Being around Martina and her son and daughter makes me realise that that's what I yearn for: my own family, my own stability.

I've got three brothers and one sister. Karen, my little sister, she's our princess. She's absolutely spoiled rotten. I do everything for her, she's very important to me.

I've had a rough ride from the tabloids recently (Bannerman made headlines in 2007 for flirting with singer Cerys Matthews on I'm a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! despite being in a relationship] but it's water off a duck's back. I basically fell in love with someone and that's it. I never intended to hurt anyone – I know I did and I deeply regret that, I just fell head over heels. As time went on I did think about what it must've been like for that person at home. She'd have been in bits.

I've realised that I'm not terribly good at relationships. Being in love is all-consuming – it knocks me for six. I just can't help myself.

I've got no interest in getting into a relationship now. I love being in love, but when it goes wrong it destroys me. I need some time to heal, to re-evaluate and find out what I want and need.

• Marc Bannerman stars in Absurd Person Singular, 6-11 October at the King's Theatre, Edinburgh (0131-529 6000)