Robert McNeil - No viva for España: living abroad proves to be a real dud when it comes to humour

PROOF that living abroad is to experience Hell has been published in the official hippie newsletter, the Daily Mail. As Britons continue to flee their pauper-style lives, swapping grey skies for blue and character-forming rain for energy-sapping sunshine, the Shangri-La that many sought has turned out to be Hell Dorado.

This will come as grim news indeed to many loyal citizens, whose dreams of escape will have been shattered. It's like being in prison and being told the outside world is just one big jail. I do not wish to dwell on the identity of the person who has...