WE REALLY should have known it wasn't true. For years, they have been held up as shining examples of grace, elegance and monogamy. Seahorses, we were led to believe, stayed faithful to their original partners for life, setting up home, having kids, living blissfully ever after in their marine paradise.
Now, thanks to unromantic science, we know that this is not the case. Results of a study in 15 British aquariums revealed them flirtatious, wantonly promiscuous, tolerant of homosexuality and mating with multiple partners. In other words, much like u
s, as Scotland on Sunday's 2007 survey of the nation's sexual habits today reveals.
The survey, of almost 1,200 people, is a fascinating glimpse into the nation's sex life, giving a snapshot of what we do, where we do it, how we do it, how often, how long it lasts, and with whom. It shows how the nation has changed over the seven years since Scotland on Sunday last undertook a similar exercise.
Since 2000, there have been seismic changes in dating and mating, principally encouraged by widespread use of the internet. Dating websites are now visited by around a third of the population, suggesting that many men and women are too busy, or too tired, to meet a partner in the traditional way. Scots also appear to be becoming more promiscuous - possibly sending an important message to the health-education lobby. Not only has the percentage of us who have had one-night stands risen, so too has the number who have had 20 partners or more.
The internet aside, the workplace is apparently becoming the dating agency of choice, with the number of Scots who have had a sexual relationship with a colleague increasing from 30% to 50% in just seven years. This may reflect Britain's long-hours office culture, which in turn could explain why almost two-thirds of us are too tired for sex when we get home.
The survey records the factors preventing us having sex and the excuses we employ when the most primeval urge of all has mysteriously deserted us. There are signs, too, of an increasing liberalisation in Scottish society towards sex and sexuality. Tolerance of homosexuality appears to have grown remarkably since 2000, and almost half of the nation use sex toys and visit pornographic websites.
In 2007, 27%, by far the biggest proportion, says they would leap into the sack (still the preferred location for 44%) on a first date, compared to 17% in 2000. Only 9% would even consider waiting a fortnight.
The survey was e-mailed to UK registered users of Scotsman.com on January 12. A total of 1,767 completed questionnaires were returned, of which 1,200 Scottish answers were used. Analysis was carried out using SNAP. Figures have been rounded up to one decimal place
Regional differences
There is no doubting that the hotbed of moral outrage in Scotland is the Central region, where 35% of those polled think there is far too much sex on television. Only Strathclyde came close, with 28%.
Those who most like spicy viewing stay in Grampian, but they are also most likely to seek pleasure away from home.
Almost half admit to infidelity, compared to 34% in Central and 36% in Fife. Those north-easterners are also almost twice as likely to have paid for sex (14%) as their Central counterparts (8%).
When it comes to satisfaction with their sex lives, however, Taysiders are hard to beat, with only 12.5% saying there is room for improvement. This may be because Dundonians are most likely to have sex on a first date (32%), have most partners (25% have had more than 20) and most one-night stands.
Central is at the other end of the scale, with a third of people saying their sex lives could be better. On the plus side, love-making here lasts longer. Almost half of residents claim that their sessions last 15 to 30 minutes – only a quarter in Grampian have the same staying power.
Strathclyde has also yielded interesting results. Of those polled in the region, 6% have never have sex, while 8% say they first had sex because they were drunk and two-thirds would like sex more often.
Excuses, excuses
IT HAS long been suspected, but now here is the proof that the pace of modern life is taking its toll on bedroom performances. Almost two-thirds of our survey (64%) report that they have been too tired to have sex, while around a third also blame stress (33%) and overwork (31%) for lack of action between the sheets.
Children are also a major passion-killer, with 36% of respondents saying that their offspring have got in the way of inter-parental relations. A rather tragic one in ten claim that they have been too engrossed in TV to make love with their partner, while 6% admit that they have been too busy on the internet.
Being too tired also comes out as the top excuse for not having sex, with one in five Scots deploying it at some time. However, women (25%) claim tiredness more often than men (16%) and are twice as likely to blame the kids. The time-honoured headache is also a favoured female strategy – going some way towards justifying men’s age-old suspicions – with 14% using it as an excuse, compared to 6% of men.
One in 12 women (8%) will also use an argument with their partner as a reason to say "not tonight", while only 6% of men employ the same tactic.
Alternative activities have thrown up some fascinating gender differences. While 86% of men say they disagree with the statement that they would prefer a nice cup of tea and an early night to sex, one in three of the women polled are not so sure. Perhaps surprisingly, though, one in five men (20%) admit that they prefer chocolate to sex, while just 13% of women agree. Both genders concur, however, that sex is a great way to keep fit.
The internet and sex
QUESTIONS about internet use were not included in our 2000 survey, since its true impact was yet to be felt. We now realise that it has brought significant changes in many areas of life, including the art of dating and mating.
Almost a third of the sample (29%) have visited internet dating websites in search of a partner, and 18% have followed that up with a date with someone they met online. One in six have "talked dirty" to a stranger they encountered in an internet chatroom, and – in a finding that will not amuse employers – one in ten have used their work PCs to gain access to internet pornography sites.
Gender differences in cyberspace are not that significant, with the same number of men and women visiting dating websites. However, women (22%) are more likely than men (16%) to follow this up with a face-to-face meeting. The same number of women as men like to talk dirty online, but their views differ dramatically over pornography sites. While 16% of men are happy to log on at work, only 2% of women would consider doing so.
British attitudes to pornography still seem to be lagging well behind continental mores, with just 43% of Scots using it as a sexual aid. But while 64% of men visit pornographic websites, only 23% of women do so. As has always been the case, men also buy more pornographic magazines, but – perhaps surprisingly – more women (62%) than men (56%) watch pornographic videos or DVDs.
Health psychologist Cynthia McVey believes that the rise in use of internet dating sites results from an increasing number of women getting involved in the culture of long working hours. "More women are going to university and more are getting professional jobs," she says.
"It means that they are too tired to go out socialising, and turn to the internet instead to find a partner."
Sex and society
ONE OF the strongest findings of the survey is Scotland’s changing attitude towards homosexuality. Seven years ago, just over a third of Scots were completely at ease with the idea of homosexuality. Now that number has risen to 60%. Similarly, while 20% found homosexuality completely unacceptable in 2000, only 6% still hold that view. Those who do not agree with it, but consider what happens in private none of their business, have dropped from 39% to 22%. As in 2000, though, it’s still women who are more accepting – 71%, compared to 54% of men. One in five women openly agree with homosexuality, but just one in ten men think the same way.
Overall, more than 90% of respondents are sure that society is either much more accepting (60%) or a little more accepting (33%) of homosexuality than it was ten years ago. This reflects major changes in gay rights, including the advent of civil partnerships, more legal equality for gay partners, the repeal of laws banning the promotion of homosexuality in schools and moves to allow gay couples to adopt children.
Across the nation, agreement that people are entitled to their own sexual preferences is now the majority view, with about 60% of respondents sharing that opinion. Lothian stands out as the region with the highest percentage of those who openly agree with homosexuality (18%), while Tayside has the lowest (7%). Lothian also has the lowest number (4%) who are completely against homosexuality in all cases.
Cynthia McVey, senior lecturer in psychology at Glasgow Caledonian University, says this greater acceptance of homosexuality follows society’s mood. "More people are coming out about their sexuality and being vociferous about equal rights. This is creating a climate in which acceptance that people have a right to express themselves is growing."
