A BLATANT fusion of 1990s business series Troubleshooter and Channel 4's own The Secret Millionaire – not to mention an almost exact conceptual reversal of I'm Running Sainsbury's, showing on 4 tonight – Undercover Boss took all the pedestrian trope
s of modern factual entertainment and scrunched them into a miserable, punctured ball.
As the title so tantalisingly suggested, it featured a director of a large company going undercover among his own oblivious workforce to find out what it's really like down there, in the hope of coming up with some practical solutions to the firm's problems. It couldn't be simpler. Or more tedious to endure.
The misleadingly named Andy Edge is the marketing director for Park Resorts, which is apparently the second-largest caravan holiday company in the UK.
The company, which prides itself on its value-for-money holidays, was hoping to capitalise on the recession by encouraging cash-strapped holidaymakers to stay at one of their many caravan resorts around the UK. Brilliant marketing man that he is, Edge had evidently realised that taking part in a gimmicky Channel 4 documentary was a fantastic way of procuring free advertising for this campaign (with this and the Sainsbury's thing, C4 are being heroically charitable at present).
While helping out at a resort in Norfolk, Edge told his employees that he was partaking in a documentary about ordinary people trying out new jobs for the first time. This, presumably, was a banal enough idea to convince them that it must be genuine. Almost the entire resort staff were on the minimum wage, so naturally none of them were happy. Demoralised, the cleaners grumbled about earning a pittance for scrubbing caravans, which are apparently often awash with vomit and urine – who's been staying in them, Pete Doherty? Even more alarming was their kitchen being staffed by just two chefs-cum-waiters with no qualifications in catering or hygiene. One of them, an affable chap seemingly portrayed by Shaun Ryder, at least made up in dogged commitment for what he lacked in qualified ability.
This was all in stark contrast to the situation Edge found at his Isle of Wight resort, where cleaning staff earn twice as much as their Norfolk counterparts, thanks to a streamlined employment system devised by their supervisors. As a result of this, everyone seemed happy and efficient. Edge, after seven days of being told how much his employees hated Park Resorts, was understandably impressed and relieved by this. In the end, a handful of these little people were summoned to head office, where Edge's true identity was finally revealed.
Their surprise was presumably second only to their disappointment that he wasn't a secret millionaire about to give them a ginormous cheque.
After politely telling the Norfolk lot to either shape up or ship out, he promoted the Isle of Wight supervisor to a new position in charge of reforming the entire company's wages system, and sent the harassed chef on a gratis 12-month catering course. Emotive Sigur Ros-style music began to play, everyone spoke of how the experience had changed them for the better, and Park Resorts doubtless congratulated themselves on a PR job well done.
The moral: a happy workforce will ensure there are no traces of vomit or urine in your holiday caravan. So that's nice.
